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EMPTY ARMS?
If you and your husband long to have a family, but it just doesn't seem to be happening, you are not alone. According to ACCESS, Australia's infertility network, 15% of Aussie couples of reproductive age have a fertility problem. Medical journals report that the rate of infertility has reached epidemic proportions.

Perhaps someone close to you is the one with empty arms, and though you long to comfort them, you're not sure how best to go about it. I know this feeling only too well, as Team Members Anissa Jones and also Joanne Brinsfield waited many years before finally conceiving.

Here, Anissa shares a little of her experiences and plenty of helpful hints. 

MY INFERTILITY JOURNEY
August 1992 is a date I will never forget as it was the month that my husband of 5 years and I commenced trying for a family. I stopped taking the pill, optimistically anticipating the pitter-patter of little feet in the near future.

Six months and just one period later however, it dawned on me that my body wasn’t functioning normally, and that our dreams of parenthood might not be realised as quickly as I first thought. Tentatively, I sought consultation with my GP, thus commencing my infertility journey. 

THE ROLLER COASTER RIDE BEGINS
Over the next two years, I experienced a wild ride an emotional roller-coaster, as my specialist commenced treatment with temperature charts and timed intercourse before proceeding to blood and hormone tests, fertility drugs and finally, surgery.

At long last I received my diagnosis – polycystic ovaries and endometriosis. Surgery corrected the problem in the short term, but to say I was devastated when my old problems recurred just 2 months later, would be a gross understatement! At this point, my specialist estimated my chances of conceiving were less than 2% and recommended that we consider IVF treatment through the GIFT program.

GIVING UP OUR HOPES AND DREAMS
After much soul-searching my husband and I decided against pursuing further treatment due to moral and ethical concerns, and the weakened state of our marriage. (This is not to say that others shouldn't have IVF etc, just that personally we had some concerns). Releasing a dream is never easy and both of us struggled with circumstantial depression as we withdrew from church activities and gave up hope of ever having a child.

Slowly we struggled to adjust to our new reality, never imagining that 12 months later, I would be pregnant! Without my knowledge, my dear sister and a close friend had been constantly interceding on my behalf and God saw fit to answer their prayers affirmatively. 

THE POWER OF PRAYER
23 April, 1996, is another date that is permanently etched on my memory – my daughter’s birthday! Statistics estimate that 1 in 7 couples will experience difficulty in achieving pregnancy. If you are currently travelling your own infertility journey, some of these suggestions may help.

WHEN IT ALL SEEMS TOO MUCH

• PRAY! Pray before seeking treatment, and before making decisions about alternatives.. Cover your marriage with prayer so it can withstand the pressure of magnified intrusion into the most intimate aspect of your life together.
• Tell your pastor, family and close friends. Infertility is too hard a burden to bear alone. You need their love, support and prayer!
• Don’t be surprised if your relationship with God gets rocky. Immerse yourself in Him and His Word, renewing your mind as it will be under attack.
• Use your moral and ethical beliefs to screen all potential treatment options.
• Limit the length of time on treatment if your marriage is suffering. We’ve all heard stories of couples who just cannot give up. No matter how desperately you want children, nothing is worth wrecking your marriage.
• Try not to plan your life around the possibility of pregnancy. Live in the present and don’t put off planning things because you "might" get pregnant.
• Have a general answer ready for when casual acquaintances ask when you are going to have children. Something like "soon, hopefully" to "in God’s timing" or you could just be honest and say "we haven’t been able to have any yet".
• Finally, accept the reality that some couples will never conceive, despite treatment, and that includes Christian couples! Consider options of adoption, foster parenting, or even making a conscious decision to be more involved in the lives of children around you (like an honorary aunt or uncle). Hard as it is, try to remember that God has not forgotten you; He has other things in mind for your life.

[ About Footprints ]   [ News & Updates ]  [ How to Subscribe ]   [ Meet the Team ]   [ Latest Issue ]   [ Letters from Readers ]   [ Mission Statement ]  

[ Clues to your Calling ]  [ Food for Thought ]  [ Dealing with Depression ]   [ The Heartache of Infertility ]   [ Writer's Guidelines ]  

[ Related Links ]  [ Speaker Services ]   [ Janet's Testimony ]   [ Love that Library ]   [ FOCUS E-zine ]   [ NEW: Prayer Points ]

[ Home: http://www.footprintsaustralia.com ]

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